7.29.2010


this monday aug.2nd it will be THREE years since i got home from my mission in armenia. the experiences, the feelings, the language, the people, it all seems to be slipping away from me as time goes. but i know, or hope, it will never leave me entirely. i was reading my journal the other day from this time...

August 1, 2007:"I am really excited to go home. I have missed my family so much. I also miss the familiarities of home and am excited to be there again. What do I look forward to? Some serious things, some kind of not so serious.

Serious: seeing my parents, playing with Aubrie and Cory, attending an American ward, dancing again, going on dates, going to lunch with the old sisters and MTC sisters, going on trips, the TEMPLE, talking with my brothers, catching up with my friends.

Non-serious: CEREAL, sleeping when I want, listening to love songs, milk, not using a filter for water, a normal shower, driving, staying up past 10:30.

As much as I am excited to go home, I feel a sadness for leaving this calling and this country. There are many many things that I will miss, which are all serious to me: preaching all day every day, speaking Armenian, meeting random people and becoming best friends, seeing people's lives slowly change for good, the tatiks (grandmas) and papiks (grandpas), seeing the power and influence of the elders, P-day gatherings with the sisters, giving out copies of the Book of Mormon, seeing big miracles, hearing Armenian jokes that are never funny, the ice cream, the fruit, the bread, little kids speaking Armenian, mission conference, hearing missionaries' testimonies, getting advice from President, telling the Joseph Smith story in Armenian, feeling the hush and the spirit while telling that story, crazy drivers, laughing with companions, crying with companions, seeing and experiencing the gift of tongues, wearing Christ's name on my chest every day, flying with angels, knowing that I am doing the same work as the Apostles, teaching the Plan of Salvation to those who have lost a loved one, having conversations about Christ on marshutnies (buses), always carrying a Book of Mormon, and being a missionary for Jesus Christ."

August 2, 2007 on the plane home: "I'm not sure how I feel right now. I kind of feel like I'm in a dream and that any second I will wake up in a little apartment in Yerevan. I guess I will say that I feel peaceful. As weird as it is to actually be on the plane heading home, I feel good and know that I am in the hands of the Lord."

what an experience! i was excited to go home. i wasn't one of those missionaries trying to extend their mission or crying for days before they had to leave. it was freakin hard! by far the hardest thing i've ever done in my life. but if i could go back, i would do it all over again. it's an experience you can't get anywhere else. it makes you stronger. and more importantly, it touches people's lives and spreads the gospel over the earth.

my sister-in-law, jamie, just got her mission call today! she will be serving in the russia samara mission. wow. if anyone can handle a russia mission, it's jamie. i know she'll love every minute of it.

4 comments:

SJ said...

Oh Queer Bridges. I love you so much! I remember the day you got home from your mission. I miss you terribly. Call me soon.

Love you lots.

Loves,

SESUO KRUSKTIN

J & J said...

i was just telling my sister-in-law, who went into the MTC a few weeks ago, how you made me pee my pants multiple times in the MTC. particularly one time in the cafeteria. holy cow. i've been home for so long, and i feel the same things slipping away from me. but i just pray so hard that i won't forget what meant so much to me way back when. love you queer. miss you terribly.

Anna Alyse said...

momma jan! three years! Ah! I just had my two year mark in June! Weird. Glad that I am a year behind you in everything, including marrying an elder from the mission. ;)

Heidi said...

Queer must mean sister in Armenian, huh? Thanks so much for sharing personal thoughts and feelings from your mission. I am so happy you and Tyler chose each other and that you can be a part of our lives. I am thankful you chose to go on a mission and will have a secret language to speak in front of your kids, and that they will see a strong woman of God for a mother.